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Sit in Jail…FOREVER!

by Nick Vitrano

This “where are they now?” segment brought to you by Big Chief Chewing Tobacco.  If you’re looking for Tom Guiry, Scotty Smalls from the movie “The Sandlot,” and you can’t seem to find him, you’re not looking anywhere.  Guiry’s face…err mug shot…is plastered all over the internet, following his arrest for felony assault of a public servant.  And he looks basically the same, save a few wrinkles around the eyes and seeming botox lips.  Seriously, what’s with those lips?

HERE are all the details of his arrest, and his photo.  I guess it’s bad to show up hammered for a flight and then resist, threaten officers, attempt to kick an officer in the face, then connect on a head-butt to an officer’s face.  Who knew?

I’m certain the potential maximum penalty for Guiry’s actions will fall short of this…but how great would it be if the judge, at sentencing, busted out this clip?  “Mr. Guiry, you are hereto sentenced to pay a fine of $15,000 and serve a jail term of…”