I'm not a criminal, but if I was I would want to make sure I went to jail for something respectable, which is pretty much anything EXCEPT stealing Justin Beiber Valentine's from the store. 

Back on the 12th, 50-year-old Michael Pete Harding of South Grafton, Massachusetts was busted shoplifting a shopping cart's worth of stuff from a Target.  And what was the highlight of the stuff he stole?

 Several packages of JUSTIN BIEBER Valentine's. Michael also shoplifted several cases of Red Bull, some containers of Tide, and some groceries.

 Store security spotted him running through the parking lot with his cart full of stolen merchandise, and called the cops.  An officer ended up in a foot race with Michael, which ended when the cop TASED him.

 Michael was arrested for larceny and resisting arrest.

They didn't say this in the report, but rumor has it (rumor that I am making up right now) that he screamed "Baby! Baby! Baby NOOOO!" As he was tased.